Ghost Adventures – Montenegro Special

The wind rustling through the trees. A creepy old building. Hordes of bats. Sounds like the perfect start for a horror movie, but in fact it was the start of a little trip into the Vrmac Fort on the mountainside by Kotor.

After taking the road up to Troica, we took a right turn up the mountain that separates Kotor from Tivat. Immediately it was clear that the road wasn’t a regularly used one. With potholes large enough to swallow a well fed pre-school child, the glorified donkey track was a formidable foe. But, with the Lithuanian Colin McRae at the wheel of our plucky Fiat Panda we were ready for everything Montenegro threw at us.

Eventually, we reached the imposing stone and concrete structure. Finished at the end of the 19^th century and used in various conflicts including the First World War, it was a solid slab of a building. Looking at it’s dark exterior and boarded up windows the fort looked like it might be the perfect place for a good old fashioned haunting. But, with the surefooted naivety of youth and the nagging need for adventure, we found our entrance to the building in no time (through the only window that wasn’t barred).

Through the window and into the fort it was immediately clear this was a good plan. Obviously, I don’t mean in terms of safety; it was an abandoned, pitch black fort, up a narrow road, with bars on the windows and severe fire damage. But what’s life without mortal danger? As we walked around, impossibly dark, scary, square pits in the floors would appear from the gloom. It would’ve been incredibly easy to fall into one of these holes that seemingly had no bottom. If you fell you would maybe break some bones, suffer a concussion (either of which might ruin your day), but the real kicker would be when your friends realise that you’re a lost cause and leave you to perish in the floor chasm to be eaten alive by bats. All while they go back to the flat, maybe have a beer or two, relax and put their feet up. Friendship is a cruel volatile mistress and I can personally attest to the mild and momentary heartache caused by leaving a man behind. In fact, the ice cold beer I sipped at, after we left Timothy in that hole swatting helplessly at his voracious winged foes, just wasn’t quite as refreshing as before. A true travesty… but nothing another beer and a nice hot shower couldn’t solve. RIP Tim, you died so that we might not have to reach down a dirty floor-hole to get you.

Anyway, with a torch and some common sense, you can avoid Timothy’s fate and have a nice explore. The dark corridors didn’t play host to any ghostly soldiers but a gigantic bat, that could’ve easily snatched one of those fluffy handbag dogs from a well to do woman, did fly over my head. Now if these pterodactyl-esque bats could carry off every pug in the world I would not complain, but their incessant squeaking in the darkness wasn’t appreciated in the slightest.

We wandered around some more, finding gun positions upstairs and other defensive structures around the place. I was often preoccupied trying to get a good photo and would look around to see my so-called friends walking off with the torch and leaving me to fend for myself. After exploring most of the fort and dodging the obstacles I felt like I could do the impossible. I felt I could complete Way of the Warrior on Raven. Not even Navar could stop me.

For those who haven’t watched Raven, it’s a children’s obstacle course style TV show where the villain was Nevar (Raven backwards) and the host was a Scottish man dressed as a raven. It might not sound enthralling but the reality is, many children were claimed by Nevar for failing to complete The Way of The Warrior (the final challenge) so let’s not make light of such hardship. Also, did I mention a Scottish man dressed as a raven? If these things don’t tick your boxes I’m not sure what will.

We left the fort the way we had come in, glad to see the light of day. We wandered around in the surrounding woodland and saw lots of other abandoned buildings which were also interesting but not quite as impressive as the fort. On the way back to Troica, we saw Barry the Tortoise. The little guy had a reckless disregard for the rules of the road and was almost run over by the Panda. He didn’t take very well to the name Barry and ran with surprising speed into the undergrowth never to be seen again.

Final thoughts

Now, after nearly 21 years on this Earth, I finally have something to say about the Austro-Hungarian Empire; they could build a fairly sturdy fort. Shame their empire ended 100 years ago otherwise I’d be inclined to let them know.