Fate or La Fortuna?

Eager to leave Liberia as quickly as possible, for reasons made blindingly obvious in my post, we got up at 6am for a long day of travel to La Fortuna.

Arriving at the bus station in Liberia, which was just around the corner, we were confronted with a strange feeling. There was no assault on the senses that we had experienced in Nicaragua and there was no verbal barrage from taxi drivers. We walked to where the bus was supposed to be and, as if by magic, it was there. A quick chat with the bus driver and we were on our way. Simple.

The bus rides from Liberia to La Fortuna weren’t hard. They were comfortable coaches driving on much better roads than we had previously experienced. The route to La Fortuna was: Liberia – Cañas – Tilarán – La Fortuna. 

At Tilarán I encountered my first money issue, ATMs weren’t keen on accepting my card at all. It’s safe to say I was a little bit miffed. Luckily, the bus ride to La Fortuna cheered me up, there’s nothing better than sleep and spectacular views to help you forget about serious adult problems. When I was asleep I’m sure my brain, lathered in chemicals, was sending me through a whacky psychedelic world of distorted and incongruous scenes but while I was awake we skirted the shores of Lake Arenal to the right and the dark dense rainforest to the left. At the end of the lake we were treated to a rare view of Volcán Arenal uncovered by cloud. Usually the perfect cone volcano doesn’t like to show its face, but for such a keen geologist such as myself (deep level of sarcasm intended) the clouds parted so I could see all the features in excruciating detail.

The Town

There are only three certainties in life: birth, death and a fiery hatred for those people revving their engines late at night living on as an underlying bitterness in my soul. After a long bus ride to an ugly tourist hub of a town, I needed my beauty sleep (you don’t reach a solid 4/10 without some peaceful snoozing), and now thanks to their selfishness I’ve changed forever. Maybe one day I’ll return and face those who transformed me so utterly, those who scarred my very soul with hatred. But, until that day, I’ll continue walk this Earth a broken man.

The previously mentioned money issues came to a head when we arrived in La Fortuna and I realised it wasn’t just Tilarán’s ATMs that had beef with me. A ring to my bank and some thoughts on how to survive another two weeks in Central America later, I had only one option. I needed to find a way of getting the rest of the money that I would need for Costa Rica without having use of ATMs. After finding the bank and realising that no one in the bank spoke any English, I gathered the essentials for the long haul of negotiations. I prayed to Señor Torres and to Mrs Matthews to forgive my mediocrity at Spanish in school and to imbue me with their linguistic blessing. But perhaps most importantly, I lay prostrate to Antonio Banderas, a Spanish idol and the most courageous man I know (not just anyone could square up to humanoid thumb henchmen and be calm – yes I’m talking about that harrowing documentary ‘Spy Kids’). I was as ready as I ever would be.

After long stunted explanations and lots of photocopying we had sorted it out. I dapped up the bank lady and fist bumped the guard on my way out. No, no that’s a lie, I wish I was that cool. Instead, I politely walked out with my money. I had estimated how much money I’d need for the next week and left very relieved. Without my somewhat shaky grasp of Spanish it’s possible that the rest of my stay in Central America wouldn’t have been so comfortable or prolonged. However, this was not my only money issue and the next one, rearing its ugly head in Panama, was a little more cause for concern.

The Waterfall

La Fortuna waterfall lay around 6km outside La Fortuna and we decided to walk there, which apparently isn’t the done thing. We may’ve decided on hiking but we weren’t going to be following conventional hiking rules. Feeling burdened by the weight of hiking expectations alongside the physical weight of actual hiking equipment, we decided to ditch the rucksack and carry only a small bottle of water each. To our minimalist minds there was only one missing piece to the hiking jigsaw. Food. Maybe we brought an oat filled energy bar? Or even some fruit? Nope. A horrible dry cake that tasted of washing up liquid for me and Costa Rica’s answer to Frosties for Brendan. Pure nutrition. The first kilometre or so was just through the outskirts of the town, then the rest was uphill past a few houses and restaurants. It wasn’t too strenuous because it was all along a well paved road, quite a contrast to our waterfall hike on Isla de Ometepe. Once we arrived we were appalled to find out the price was now $14, instead of the $10 that the internet had promised, so we scraped together what we had and went through the gate. There was a cafe, visitors centre and toilets but we didn’t come for any of that so we went straight for the waterfall. If you have an irrational fear of steps which the internet reliably tells me is called bathmophobia, then this isn’t the place for you. There are a fair few. After weaving deftly between stumbling case studies on the detrimental physical effects of excessive burger consumption, we thanked our creaking knees and admired the waterfall’s impressive power. Despite, the swathes of other sweaty humans obscuring the view we did enjoy the natural spectacle, however we did think that $14 was a bit steep (much like the steps). Feeling hot and wanting a swim, we headed for the area that we were allowed to swim in (the waterfall plunge pool was too strong so they had cordoned off a section of river instead). Creeping through the lush undergrowth to the waters edge we were appalled to find that the water was hardly visible due to the number of people paddling. Hating people and these rules imposed onto us we headed back up the steps. At the top, panting uncontrollably, we headed for the viewpoint which to be fair was incredible. It showed the waterfall plunging into the verdant basin, with the rainforest and volcanoes seen far into the distance.

Whitewater Rafting

There are lots of companies offering whitewater rafting and other adventure activities in La Fortuna. However, in the interest of saving money, but more importantly having a good time, I had done some research. Desafio adventure tours was the company of choice and we opted for the highest stage of rapids available in this area (class 3-4). Now, I mention in a later post, through the magic of foresight, the whitewater rafting in Montenegro and it paling in comparison to Costa Rica. Montenegro, I love you but don’t parade your lazy river boating trip as an extreme rafting trip. Read on for the real thing.

We got to the river after a great journey through the countryside with Choco our guide and Ramon our driver. Ramon could spot an iguana in a tree while being spun round, wearing a blindfold and playing blackjack. I wouldn’t subject Ramon to this frankly inhumane treatment but it demonstrates his incredible animal spotting skills. At the river itself we met a man who can only be described as a Costa Rican doppelgänger of the actor and rapper Ice Cube. He was to be our boat leader/guide, unfortunately he didn’t seem to share his American cousin’s musical ability but he could steer a boat, so he was halfway to greatness.

After our brief about how to paddle, we got into the boat. Soon we were floating on the glassy pools of the Sarapiqui river but the rumble of rushing water was ever-present and increasing in volume. It wasn’t long until were thrown right into the action, careering down enormous drops and bouncing down frothing rapids stirred up by the boulder-strewn chaos of the river bed. Charging through these frenetic waters on a heavy duty condom, controlled by everyone’s favourite gangster rapper turned low-budget Hollywood star, was heart racing stuff and juxtaposed by the tranquil pools that followed them. This cycle repeated many times and after a few hours we reached the largest of these pools, pulled Brendan back into the boat and stopped for lunch. I’m not a big lunch guy but that spread of fresh fruit was something else. Without a doubt that pineapple is the best I’ve had in my life. After stuffing my face with fruit, we floated down the river in our buoyancy aids and climbed up the bank to jump off the river cliff which was pretty fun too. Back in the boats and after another hour of uncontrollable grinning and excitement it was time to finish. We got out and were greeted with a large non-fruit based lunch, not a bad way to end at all.

In amongst the excitement of the potential loss of life or limb among the rapids, this whitewater rafting experience also gave us a chance to soak in the truly incredible views. At a glance the banks of the river were tall, dense, green walls. But on closer inspection, when you let your eyes adjust to the dark complexity beneath the canopy, where light seemed to get lost among the vines, the magnificence of the place really hits you. Life barked, chirped, whistled and chattered from every direction. A true tapestry of life unfolding in every dimension, the rainforest mesmerised us.

Final thoughts

La Fortuna has a very helpful lady who helped me with my card issues. It also has an impressive waterfall. And it did give us the opportunity to hurtle down a river fearing for our lives. Could you ask for much more? Well, yes you could.

La Fortuna isn’t a nice place. It’s not a quiet place. But, it is a fun place if you play your cards right.